Saturday, October 17, 2009

Seven Steps to Bringing Order to Chaos

Our brains are bombarded with some 2 million bits of information every second of every day. We would literally be driven insane if we processed that volume of information as fast as it came in. The brain's job is to filter that enormous amount of information down to a level where order is brought to a world of chaos, where that 2 million bits per second is actually processed at around 150 bits per second.

The world that each of us experience is based upon our own unique perceptions of what we see, hear, taste, touch and smell. Perception is the key component for each of the five senses and how they paint our world is largely an illusion. What I mean by illusion is that the world outside is a construct base on the thoughts we choose.

If you typically wake up and begin your mornings with thoughts of "I hate going to work." or "I hate my job.", these will be the exact experiences you will have throughout your day. In contrast if you start your day with thoughts of "I love myself and I'm happy to be alive." along with "I'm thankful for this new day and ready to live life to the fullest.", you set in motion the positive energy to experience a truly wonderful day. The predecessor to every action is a thought. When you understand that your life unfolds exactly how you will it to be you start to become really careful on what you think about. As Wayne Dyer states, "You can never get enough of what you don't want."

You might be thinking... "Julian - you make it sound so easy, but how the heck to you think positive thoughts when my world is falling apart?" That's a great question! We all have our own stories where we've experienced tragedy. Either the passing of someone dear to us, a breakup of a marriage, a terrible car accident, lay off or financial crisis, no one is immune to life changing events such as these. The way to move through these experiences when they do show up is to take responsibility and accountability for everything that shows up in your life. That means you stop blaming others. You accept that you are the producer, director and starring actor in the stage production known as "My Life". You can't change a lifetime of conditioned thinking overnight. What you can do however, is begin with one thought at a time. Start viewing life as a gift rather than a struggle. Refuse to blame others for your shortcomings. Begin with the end in mind. I've include the following seven steps that if applied you will bring order to the chaos in your life.

Seven Steps to Bringing Order to Chaos:

  1. Realign your thoughts. Begin moving away from thoughts that no longer serve you. Rather than thinking "I can't afford that.", "It'll never work out.", "I'll be passed over again for that promotion."; replace those limiting statements with things like "My life is abundant and more is one the way.", "I trust the all well and the Universe is working out the details.", "I love my job and invite new experiences into my career." and "There's nothing I can't do and I intend to make this day the best day ever!"
  2. Make room for silence in your life. Awaken before the rest of the family; before the busyness of the day sets in when the entire house is silent. This is when your creative mind can more easily access Spirit. Herman Melville wrote "Silence is the only voice of our God." When you remove the chatter of the daily routine and quiet the mind you connect to that from which you came from, the Universal intelligence - Source energy - God.
  3. Learn to appreciate nature. Get out of town, away from the concrete, asphalt and massive parking lots. Go to the ocean, the forest, a lake or a simple park trail and observe enormity of an oak tree. Contemplate that same creative force that turns an acorn into that giant oak tree is the same creative force that is the beauty and delicateness of a flower as well as you and me.
  4. Remove doubt and fear. Doubt and fear are instruments of the ego and their only purpose is to keep us in an illusionary bondage. By replacing thoughts of how horrible things are with thoughts of courage and faith, you will be cultivating the fertile ground of your mind allowing more possibility for continued love, joy, success and peace to show up. It's been said before, "Fear knocked at the door, Faith answered and no one was there."
  5. Create and attitude of gratitude. You'll never achieve the fullness of your heart's desires without being thankful for everything you have in this present moment. Be thankful for the air you breathe, the colors you see, the beating of your heart. Frequently tell the people closest in your life that you love them. What you give away will return to you. Love is forgiving, love is for giving.
  6. Love yourself so you can love others. Replace the negative self-talk with words and phrases of kindness and love. See yourself in the mirror and say aloud "I love you." If you don't love yourself, it's impossible to love others. You can only give away what you have.
  7. Allow yourself to simply be. Give yourself the credit you so deserve. You showed up here with some heroic mission. Be on purpose with your life. Start living the success you intend to become. Begin with the end in mind. Remember the predecessor to every action is a thought. Get comfortable with the idea that you can direct your life in any direction you want to go. You are not some powerless being floating adrift aimlessly on the sea of life. You are a wonderful, powerful co-creator of your life. Allow the genius that you are to manifest. Be amazed with the wonderful you that you are.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Toxic People and How to Handle Them

Lets face it, we all experience turbulence in our lives from time to time. Some days maybe more than others, but for those of us who are on the path to higher awareness, we know that we are able to manage that turbulence by changing our thoughts and changing our lives.

What about toxic people you say? You know those people are never happy, never satisfied, always complaining that there's something wrong!

That is indeed a challenge, but not impossible to overcome. Just this last week I found myself in a very difficult situation with a coworker. This person was obligated to complete certain deliverables by a specified date and was concerned that he would not be able to meet this deadline due to certain variables beyond his control. One of those variables included my tasks of which were on time and progressing nicely.

I had learned this person was also dealing with a family emergency concerning a loved one. When I learned of this, I thought "How can I brighten this person's day and lighten their load?". I promptly sent an e-mail cancelling a meeting and expressed my heart-felt concern for his circumstances, with prayers for a fast and speedy recovery of their loved one.

This person promptly reached back out to me via IM with "can you call me?". Anticipating a humbled person after the e-mail I had just sent, I proceeded to call. Oh, this may be a good time to let you know that this person has a history of being "high strung" and very difficult to work with. In light of the circumstance though, I felt I would honor this person with a brief phone call to make sure everything was "OK". Rather than hearing "thanks for the nice e-mail", I heard one negative comment after another and taking the victim stance that nobody seems to care about his personal situation.

I explained numerous times to the disgruntled individual that I understood his stressful situation having experienced trauma in my own life. He was not reachable at this level. He took that stance that nobody has ever undergone what he is living through and his coworkers did not care, in spite of the contrary. After his numerous failed attempts to rattle my cage, he hung up on me.

So how do you handle a person like that? No matter how nice and understanding you try to be, they still point the finger at you as the problem while they gloat in their victimness?

For starters, do not argue with them. These people are so closed off from others that they have a narrow vision of the world. They cannot see anything from another's point of view. They simply choose not to. Why? Because it keeps them in "victim mode". They are so used to viewing their world from a "what's wrong with this picture" perception that to suggest they consider a different point of view would diffuse them. It would take them down from their virtual pulpit and give them nothing to bitch about.

Next, no matter what they might say to attempt to push your buttons, counter it with something positive. This will drive them crazy, but it will leave you sane. When you don't allow yourself to be drawn down to their level of madness and mayhem you will maintain your higher levels of positive energy, allowing you to remain calm and focused on your day.

Next, and your ego will fight you on this, give up the need to be right. Toxic people will argue for the sake of argument. There was absolutely nothing negative in the e-mail I sent to this person, but all he could see was what he wanted to see. You will never win. It's the "turn the other cheek" approach for self-preservation.

Lastly, send this person a silent prayer. See them as the creation of God that they are. Remind yourself that they are not the lower energy spewing from their mouth, but rather that of a higher source. If we remove ourselves physically from these toxic personalities, i.e. phone calls, IMs or even face to face and choose not to engage, then we are better able to maintain our own higher energy. When we do, we impact the world in a positive way, raising the world's vibrational energies for good and ultimately helping those toxic people by radiating love rather than anger and hate.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

You'll Never Get it all Done!

How many times do you find yourself feeling overwhelmed with to-do lists; lists from work, lists from home, lists from the kids, lists for birthdays, lists for holidays, lists for groceries, bills to pay? On and on the lists go potentially never ending until one day you just lose it! You lose it with your spouse, you lose it with your boss and worse, you lose it with your kids. If you're like me you can sometimes feel like you're drowning in lists. You kill yourself with guilt because you think you're not being responsible for not mastering your lists. No sooner do you make headway on a few things and more show up! It's enough to make you crazy.

The simple solution is to accept the fact that you will never get it all done. Be fully engaged in the moment rather than your lists. When you do, you'll find yourself getting things done almost effortlessly, energized as you move from task to task. At the end of your day as you reflect on your accomplishments you will amaze yourself as you realize what you have done. No longer plagued by guilt or frustrating thoughts that pull you down, you are energized and ready for the dawn of the new day ahead. When you're at peace in your present moment, no longer consumed by your lists you realize that where you are and what you have in each of your present moments is all that is needed to carry you onto the next in the here and now!

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Desire + Action = Success

As of January 1, 2008 a New Years resolution of mine was to expand my public speaking skills. In January, I attended my first Toastmasters International meeting. For those of you not familiar with Toastmasters, it was formed in 1924 in Santa Ana California and has grown to become a world leader in helping people become more competent and comfortable speaking in front of an audience. The nonprofit organization now has nearly 220,000 members in 11,300 clubs in 90 countries. To my amazement I found my membership in Toastmasters to be the perfect vehicle not only to improve upon my communication skills, it is also a fabulous opportunity to develop leadership skills through active club participation. I have discovered not only am I accomplishing my first resolution to expand my public speaking skills, but my additional goals of developing leadership skills, expanding my network of influence and inspiration to write more are all being realized, all through one decision to act on a desire.

Being part of a group of people in the form of a club is much like the model of the “Mastermind” that Napoleon Hill writes about in his famous book “Think & Grow Rich”. Mr. Hill defines a “Mastermind” as the “coordination of knowledge and effort in a spirit of harmony, between two or more people, for the attainment of a definite purpose.” He suggests that in a mastermind, individuals come together for a common cause and bring to the table their own personal expertise and innovative thought, where without the assistance of the mastermind, the individual path to success would be much more difficult. Thomas Edison and Henry Ford are among the great inventors and industrialists that Napoleon Hill credits with the use of the mastermind model to achieve greatness.

I share my recent experiences with you as yet another example of how the Universe delivers all the right people, all the right opportunities, even the right amount of funding if needed. All you have to do is provide the desire. Desire + Action = Success.

Have a prosperous week ahead. I send you all green lights…

Friday, November 2, 2007

"It's a far cry from the world we thought we'd inherit"



I borrowed the title to my "way past due" latest blog entry from the song "Far Cry" from Rush's latest studio album "Snakes and Arrows". I resonate with that lyric for many reasons, but what really struck me about it is that "... the world we thought we'd inherit", once you "get it" is so incredibly better from was taught to us growing up in our schools, our churches or even our families. What I mean by "get it" is what is known as satori which means "instant awakening". It's that moment when life changes and becomes meaningful. It's when you hear that internal voice of God speaking to you, that voice which says you are independent of the good or bad opinion of others, that voice that says you are one with the Source of all things and therefore likened to God. The realization you are created in His image is your awareness. You know that you are not what you do because when you don't you're not. You discover that no matter where you are in life, what has happened in your life up to now, was all necessary and perfect to make you who you are, in this present moment. It's like "hello... I get it!"

When you really get that you no longer have to be the victim and buy into all the negativity that's broadcast over the public airwaves, published in newspapers and now transmitted via the Internet, you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are the creator of your life. You write, direct and produce each moment of your life with Divine connectedness to Source.

Back to the lyric from Rush... "it's a far cry from the world we thought we'd inherit" - when I first heard that lyric I was like... "Wow... that is so perfect!" Thank you Neil Peart for being inspired to write those words and thank you God for helping me help others in discovering that life truly is a far cry from the world we thought we'd inherit. Remembering your Spirit and your connection to Source is a daily choice which establishes you as a co-creator of your life. What you think about expands and once you get it, you become more careful of what you spend your time thinking about. You can choose to live in a world of doubt, fear, pain, sorrow, hatred, grief, guilt and all those low vibrational energies, but if you choose to focus and meditate on a life of peace, love, joy, gratitude, giving, good and God, the Universe begins to answer "YES and soon after your life begins to align with those higher vibrations of love and peace and takes on a delicious new hue of peace and contentment. Life really does get better when you choose to make it better and life is a far cry from the world we thought we'd inherit the moment you "get it"!

On a side note regarding Rush, (only the all-time most incredible rock trio ever) I got to take my 11 year old son, Aaron to see them on their Snakes and Arrows tour when they rolled through Dallas in August. It was so very cool to be there with the 18,000 other "40 and 50 something" fans and their kids. What a far cry from the first time I saw them in 1980 - 27 years earlier when I was 15.

"Celebrate the moment as it turns into one more
Another chance at victory, another chance to score" -- Neil Peart (from Rush Vapor Trails)

Sending you all green lights...

Saturday, June 30, 2007

Get Rid of Your Stinkin' Thinkin'

Life is an adventure only if you decide to make it one!

Hello! I just got back from what ordinarily would have been just another business trip for Verizon Telecom. What I experienced instead was as an adventure filled with discovery and fascination for a time period long since gone. This journey left me with a gift of appreciation for those brilliant spirits who have come before leaving me with a heart filled with inspiration (from enthusiasm the Greek entheos “en, in; + theos, god;” or “to be inspired…”) and love.

Earlier this month I was in Boston, working at 185 Franklin Street, the Verizon building that once was part of the original Bell Telephone system. In fact in the marble face of the building above the main entry there is a brass Bell logo that says American Telephone & Telegraph, DBA New England Telephone. It is in fact very beautiful piece of Bostonian architecture nestled in the financial district of downtown Boston. I was reminded of the significance of the Vail name the role it's played in telecommunications history by viewing the many plaques that adorn the walls honoring Theodore N. Vail, the first president and CEO of the original AT&T known then as American Telephone and Telegraph. Vail was chiefly responsible for selling congress on the idea of a monopoly much like the postal service had for the U.S. Mail. Congress agreed and the monopoly of “Ma Bell” was created. Vail’s dedication to basic science inspired the creation of Bell Labs, the research arm for AT&T. He was hired to serve directly by Alexander Graham Bell.

After my visit to Boston I was inspired to do more reading on Theodore N. Vail, when my geneology research took me further back in time to the early 19th century and the historic Vails of Speedwell Iron Works; more great Vails who set in motion core elements necessary to fuel the industrial revolution. As my study progressed I learned of the enormous technological contributions that Alfred Vail made to the Telegraph, the precursor to the Telephone. As history literally unfolded before my eyes I soon realized that the people and events I was reading about all took place in Morristown, a neighboring town to Madison New Jersey where I would be working on my next business trip for Verizon Telecom. Now how’s that for being in alignment with inspiration!


While in Morristown, I visited the St. Peters Episcopal Church cemetery where Alfred Vail and his father Stephen Vail of Speedwell Iron Works are buried. I had the necessary supplies to take charcoal impressions from Alfred’s headstone. As I rubbed the charcoal pencil over the raised letters their images were transferred to paper. Slowly the characters spelling out V A I L appeared. I was moved beyond words at this moment as my consciousness realized the connectedness to the brilliance of a man who contributed so much to what we know as telecommunications.

Directly across the street from the church is the Vail Mansion. The caretaker of the church informed me that this was the estate which Theodore N. Vail had constructed to retire in. He died before he would ever live there. He is buried in Parsipanny, New Jersey in what is known as the Vail Memorial Cemetery, just a few miles from Morristown, so of course I made the trip over to Vail Memorial Cemetery located on, you guessed it… Vail Road. In 1922, The Vail Mansion began service to the City of Morristown and served as their municipal building for 70 years. It has now been sold to a private developer and is being constructed into exclusive condominium and town homes.

The next day, I traveled just a bit further down 202 in Morristown which is actually Speedwell Drive and tour of the famous Speedwell Iron Works. At the visitors center I was greeted by friendly staff. When they found out I was a Vail, I received the red carpet treatment. I was given a personalized tour of the grounds and historic buildings by a bright young man and intern by the name of Josh Rockland. Josh and I hit it off and as we walked, he exclaimed “This is so cool to be escorting my first Vail here at Speedwell.” He was obviously as excited as I was to be there. A present day Vail visiting such a historically rich site of past Vails… truly an amazing experience.

Josh and I spent the next two hours going back in time to the early 1800s, a time when the Vail entrepreneurial spirit was alive and thriving, contributing immensely to what would later be known as the Industrial Revolution. It was at Speedwell Iron Works that the Telegraph was born. Alfred Vail and Samuel Morse first demonstrated the device with two miles of copper wire coiled around the room on nails. Stephen Vail, Alfred’s father was given the honor of sending the first ever message to be transmitted over copper wire “A patient waiter is no loser.”

That brilliant message still holds true to this day and is so perfectly aligned with this quote from Wayne Dyer, “Infinite patience brings immediate results.” How nicely this ties together my personal experience of this past week with my message to you which is the “essence of allowing”. You see none of what I experienced this week would have been possible had I not allowed myself the experience. Often times when we feel a drive to pursue a goal or a desire we are quick to rationalize it away by over analyzing. We essentially think it to death. Once you believe that you can do, be, and have anything you desire, then and only then will your desires manifest for you and only to the extent that you are clear. I was so clear on my intentions of a Vail pilgrimage that what showed up not only matched perfectly to my intentions, but totally blew me away. It was truly a life changing event and I am looking forward to the opportunity to return to Morristown, New Jersey with my wife and children so they can share in the heritage and history of The Vails of Speedwell Iron Works.

Returning home with an education on the Vail entrepreneurial spirit from the days of the first Telegraph at Speedwell and a renewed sense of self, I was reminded of the entrepreneurial course that Donna and I have charted; writing, publishing, coaching and speaking by harnessing the power of the Internet. If only Alfred and Theodore could see what their inventions and leadership created… the Internet, satellite communications, wireless phones and on and on the list can go. They would be astonished. One of our Internet marketing mentors, Bill Hibbler last month showcased us on his blog titled “Meet The Vails” where he said “Their first info product… is, in my humble opinion, going to be a home run. The sales letter is brilliant and so is the product.”

So get rid of the “stinkin thinkin” as the title of this blog entry wales. Get out of your own way. Remove the blocks to whatever holds you back. Welcome each new day with the excitement of a new birth. After all… the morning is the birth of a new day, so get out there and rock and roll the bones. Get busy!

Sending you love and all green lights,

Julian